by Madison Harris
(Olive Hill, KY, USA)
First of all, I'm so so excited to be working with Crown of Beauty! I know God wants to do great things through me and this ministry.
Let me also say, that I know where Livy is coming from and her message has spoken to me deeply. I know what its like to doubt God's goodness because of things you've been through. This past year I've lost friends, lost a boyfriend that I thought was "the one", and struggled in school (which is fairly new to me). I became depressed and anxious. I've developed severe trust issues, which has affected my outlook on God. I've found myself questioning whether or not He truly had good plans for me. I've felt as if my prayers went no further than the ceiling. I've definitely felt like less than God's princess. Needless to say, these feelings caused me to draw further away from God.
But God has called me out on it. Just as I would begin to doubt him, he would whisper "I'm here. I love you. I'll always love you." The revelation of His unfailing love, and the knowledge that I am so undeserving of it, would bring me to tears. I have realized that I can't pull away from God during these difficult times because, whether I feel His presence or not, it is when I need Him most. I was drowning in the things life threw my way. I held on to things of this world to try to stay afloat: people, hobbies, TV shows, etc., but in the end, I kept sinking. My God is the only true dry land. Our identity as Christians can't be found in anything else because these things will pass. The things promised to us from God are eternal.